After I found out that the Jones Institute would probably not be able to match us with in 6 months, I started looking into ways to match ourselves. I had joined a facebook group when we decided to move forward with Embryo adoption called Embryo Adoption and Donation Support Group. Previously, I had just read the post and absorbed the information that was being posted. I now decided to use one of the features in this group where embryo donors and those looking for embryos post info about themselves in hopes of matching with each other. I posted a paragraph about my husband and I and a couple pictures. No one contacted us and out the few I contacted no one responded.
It is stressful to match yourself because you don't know what your getting. Are you getting junk embryos that would never produce a baby or are you getting embryos that could carry diseases.Age can be a factor in the success of embryos and the grade of the embryos. There just so many factors that could affect the success rate of an embryo and you just don't know the full history when matching yourself.
There are a couple private matching websites that I am aware of and may be more:
We created a profile on the National Registry for Adoption and paid a $49 set up fee and then $39 a month fee with the 3 month package. We answered lots of questions about us as people. What we do for a living, what we are looking for from a donor, what we are interested in, etc. Think of a dating profile, on steroids. lol Seriously, It took quite a few hours to fill out all the questions they provide for you to answer. I contacted probably 20 or more donors through this website most never responded and the few who did respond had either already matched with someone or where already talking with a couple possible matches.
We tried to use the Miracles in Waiting website as well but I tried multiple times to join and could not get it to work.
I then was traveling for work and heard on the news about an IVF doctors office in Nashville, TN that had embryos available. I live on the northeast coast of North Carolina, so Nashville was a along way away, but I like to travel so figured I would check it out. I can't remember the name of the place, but I remember it was really expensive and when I contacted them they only had a few embryos. I just did not have a good feeling about it and I remember the cost being the same or more than doing a full round of IVF here locally.
Next, I contacted a IVF clinic in Raleigh who said they had embryos to find out they had a 2 year wait. I even contacted a clinic in Barbados, that people in an IVF facebook group I was part of where raving about. They did not have any embryos that would fit our criteria, but I was loving the idea of going to Barbados to transfer them.
Around sometime in May 2018, I was scrolling through Facebook and saw where my previous Clinic the New Hope Center had embryos. I wonder if this was another wild goose chase, but it kept sneaking in my mind. After wrestling with it for a week or so. I made the call to see, if they really had embryos. They did!!
Since, I had not been there in over a year, I had to set up an appointment with Dr. Robin to discuss the process and options. That appointment was set for early June 2018.
Saturday, September 29, 2018
Thursday, September 27, 2018
Added to Embryo Adoption List, Now we wait
I am working on catching you all up to where we are in our journey current day, but to get there I have to share with you what been going on since our last post.
After our last failed IVF attempt with the Jones Institute and based on our follow up appointment, We came to the decision to move forward with adopting an embryo. We made this decision for a couple reason:
We then contacted the Jones Institute to be added to the wait list for Embryo Adoption. To get on the list we needed to fill out a questionnaire that asked us questions about our self: like Hair color, skin color, eye color, height, weight, etc. We then where asked to write down which characteristics where the most important to us for the Jones Institute match when choosing an embryo. We only asked that they match our skin color. We live in a small town with old time values. I feel that people would already have a hard time accepting/understanding that we are trying to bring a baby into this world that not genetically ours. If we ended up giving birth to a baby that did not match our skin color that would just cause unnecessary drama for us and the baby. It just easier on everyone, if the skin color matched. By choosing only one characteristics we hoped that would allow us to be matched quickly.
We turned in our completed questionnaire in December 2017 and where added to the wait list. At that time the current wait list was projected to be about 6 months. The importance of the questionnaire is to be used in the matching process. You may be wondering where the embryos come from. Other families who have used Jones Institute and have gone on to have healthy babies, may have additional frozen embryos that they don't plan to use. They can choose to donate their embryos to the embryo adoption program to help other families who are struggling to become parents.
As we played the waiting game to be matched. We decided to go ahead full the requirement of meeting with a psychologist. As part of embryo adoption process, you are required to have a counseling session with a psychologist. You don't choose your own psychologist, they refer you to someone who specialize in fertility counseling. We made our appointment in December and went in for a visit. I was fearful that the psychologist was judging us to make sure we would be good candidates for this program, but that not what happens at all. She just explained to us how the program worked, answered any questions we had and encouraged us to always be open and honest with the child/children about the way they where conceived.
Then we waited and waited for the Jones Institute to call with our match. During this time we continued to pay down our credit card debt from our last failed IVF attempt. Around April I called in for an update on the wait list and found out that not many previous patients where donating their embryos and they where not sure when an embryo would be available for adoption. This was pretty depressing, it felt like another slap in the face.
After our last failed IVF attempt with the Jones Institute and based on our follow up appointment, We came to the decision to move forward with adopting an embryo. We made this decision for a couple reason:
- My eggs are crap and can not make viable embryos,
- Adopting an embryo is much cheaper than traditional adoption
- and based on cost, we could move forward with embryo adoption quicker than any other option.
We then contacted the Jones Institute to be added to the wait list for Embryo Adoption. To get on the list we needed to fill out a questionnaire that asked us questions about our self: like Hair color, skin color, eye color, height, weight, etc. We then where asked to write down which characteristics where the most important to us for the Jones Institute match when choosing an embryo. We only asked that they match our skin color. We live in a small town with old time values. I feel that people would already have a hard time accepting/understanding that we are trying to bring a baby into this world that not genetically ours. If we ended up giving birth to a baby that did not match our skin color that would just cause unnecessary drama for us and the baby. It just easier on everyone, if the skin color matched. By choosing only one characteristics we hoped that would allow us to be matched quickly.
We turned in our completed questionnaire in December 2017 and where added to the wait list. At that time the current wait list was projected to be about 6 months. The importance of the questionnaire is to be used in the matching process. You may be wondering where the embryos come from. Other families who have used Jones Institute and have gone on to have healthy babies, may have additional frozen embryos that they don't plan to use. They can choose to donate their embryos to the embryo adoption program to help other families who are struggling to become parents.
As we played the waiting game to be matched. We decided to go ahead full the requirement of meeting with a psychologist. As part of embryo adoption process, you are required to have a counseling session with a psychologist. You don't choose your own psychologist, they refer you to someone who specialize in fertility counseling. We made our appointment in December and went in for a visit. I was fearful that the psychologist was judging us to make sure we would be good candidates for this program, but that not what happens at all. She just explained to us how the program worked, answered any questions we had and encouraged us to always be open and honest with the child/children about the way they where conceived.
Then we waited and waited for the Jones Institute to call with our match. During this time we continued to pay down our credit card debt from our last failed IVF attempt. Around April I called in for an update on the wait list and found out that not many previous patients where donating their embryos and they where not sure when an embryo would be available for adoption. This was pretty depressing, it felt like another slap in the face.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)